sitcoms

From ‘Feckham Hall’, a radio sitcom about impoverished aristocratic folk:

CLARISSA:  Dearest Jonathan. You know how much I love you. I adore you. Ever since we met on that assertiveness course. And then several months later, when we shared our first ‘hello’. Ever since we moved in together, I’ve always stood by you.

JONATHAN:  I know, nugget. We must buy another chair.

From ‘Almost’, a TV sitcom in which two cynical job-seekers attempt to start their own business:

ANDY:  There’s definitely something odd about this car.

HONEY:  Yes, it’s a Nissan Micra.

ANDY:   You can’t possibly believe it’s possessed!

HONEY:  I don’t think you should joke about it. I watched this programme once about a man who claimed to be possessed by the spirit of Rod Hull. He strangled three women to death with one hand and blamed it all on Emu. And he got off too.

ANDY:  With the same hand?!

HONEY:  Just start the car.